Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Death threats make the baby Jesus cry. **

Yay! You are all officially nerds, some are even literary nerds. I have to admit that I've read a shit load of books. However, few of them appeared in that so called, "How bookish are you" quiz.

Here's my quiz:

How much time to you spend knitting a PROTOtype for the tetrahymena (which you all spelled correctly in your comments...go team?)

A - zero hours
B - When is Christmas again? Cause I spent 4 hours
C - four days

Canya guess which one I would pick?


The Prototype which is now a dog toy:



As you can see we have a start here. I have never knit spherical object before. So, I knit it with any ridges or fur just to get the feel of the mechanics. What I learned:

1. Decreasing and increasing looks wonky.
2. Ribbing will be incredible difficult to keep consistent for the above reason.
3. Something meaning to look like an eggplant/pear will really look like a circle. Must exaggerate the shape.
4. Felting would make this a lot easier.

The last item, I think, is the kiss of mercy. Today I purchased Green Lamb's Pride and some eyelash yarn/string. These two items will get to know one another on a brief visit to my knitting basket. The visit will last as long as it takes me to finish the three baby sweaters I have going, the shawl for my mom I haven't started AND all of the wrapping paper.


** While I think that the situation behind the need for this sentence (as described here on the Harlot's blog) is deplorable, I have to admit that this phrase has kept me giggling for the past 24 hours.



ETA: You know what else makes the baby Jesus cry? Bad spelling. Bad spelling makes the baby Jesus cry. So sorry.

16 Comments:

Blogger Chris said...

I agree with you on how funny the phrase is, but how perturbing the situation...

Good luck getting all of those things done so you can pursue your felting mission!

Oh, I see from your sidebar that you're a Stephanie Plum fan... so - Morelli or Ranger?

12/20/2005 7:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm hoping to use it in coversation very, very soon. That and tetrahymena. Bonus points if they're in the SAME conversation.

I'm so sick of this holiday season already. Mainly because of assholes like the ones who made baby Jesus cry.

I love you though.

12/20/2005 7:33 PM  
Blogger Carole Knits said...

No pressure with the holiday knitting, right? Cuz THAT would make the baby Jesus cry.

12/20/2005 9:08 PM  
Blogger WandaWoman said...

Is is sad that as soon as I saw the title, I knew it from the Yarn Harlot?

12/20/2005 10:57 PM  
Blogger Sanders said...

Ha! that phrase has been in my head all day as I hear people bitching about the whole holiday vs. christmas thing.... I love the harlot.

Also thanks for pointing me to the Pandora thing, I love it.

I read alot of the same books you do, based on the list in your side bar, and am always fascinated by how two people can enjoy the same two books that have seemingly NO common thread. The pandora thing has apparently figured out some of the ficklenes of taste!

Happy knitting!

12/20/2005 11:19 PM  
Blogger Dana S. Whitney said...

I think crochet (if you know how to do it) would be MUCH easier with which to make a hairy eggplant "trickyhymen" thingy. Or you could loosely felt a big wad of roving...... (I LOVE felting!! Such a nice agression relieving thing to do: stab stab stab stab.)
Good luck on finishing the baby sweaters, and the reading. And you KNIT wrapping paper? Surely I misunderstood.... I'm ready for a fast trashy read.. All I have is "serious books." Guess I'll have to suck it up. Or knit. 4 pairs of socks on my agenda, if not the needles.

12/21/2005 2:42 AM  
Blogger wenders said...

I think I make the baby Jesus cry daily, if bad spelling makes him cry. :(

And I so can't wait to see how this thing turns out. (I can't spell it's name, so to me, it will be the thing.)

12/21/2005 6:54 AM  
Blogger maryse said...

as a biology major and obsessed with cilia i'm a little upset that i had never heard of a tetrahymena until you showed me the light. maybe they hadn't been discovered yet 20 years ago. it's possible!

i read that harlot post. that she got that kind of ugliness from "christians" is what has turned me away from religion. sorry baby jesus, but you've got some scary ass people who use your name in vain.

12/21/2005 7:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Baby Jesus makes me cry all the time.

Wait - is that wrong?

12/21/2005 9:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I laughed out loud when she wrote the line. I think part of it was the "ho ho ho" at the end. Brilliance!

12/21/2005 9:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hon - I'm just impressed you knitted a prototype at all. Some people (ahem, me) would have just launched right in with the good yarn, and probably ditched the effort in frustration after ruining the good stuff.

I make the Baby Jesus cry daily. And not because of my spelling. Or maybe that's just my Catholic guilt talking.

12/21/2005 9:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm glad you liked the line. Simple, succinct...
(and it makes me laugh too.)

12/21/2005 10:30 AM  
Blogger Melissa said...

I loved that sentence too...

When I read the first post, I was wondering if garter stitch would work better. Have you seen the side-to-side knitted ball pattern here?

http://www.jgibson.cts.com/knitting/yarnball.htm

Its shaped by shortrows. I would think you could extend one side to make more of an eggplant shape.

12/21/2005 12:42 PM  
Blogger Vicki said...

Felting will definitely help. Gets rid of all the wonky shaping and everything. Have you considered making a sort of fringe over the whole thing? I'm thinking that if you felted by hand (although that part in itself could take a while) you could felt each fringey part to itself to make more substantive uh, stuff. Right. Just a thought :)

12/21/2005 2:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you need the kind of wooly yarn that nmkes good cable - lambs pride, or Merino DK, or Jameisons or something -
Not something that your felt so much as sumething that felts itself a bit.

Also, Morelli.

12/21/2005 2:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oops. - Makes. Cables. Lamb's. Something.

Apologies to the Baby J.

12/21/2005 2:28 PM  

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